UM Grad Approaches Life of Hustling with 'Zealous Fortitude'

My buddy Jeff forwarded this to me and told me I could post it.  Jeff graduated from the University of Montana last Spring with degrees in Journalism and History.  This is his response to an e-mail from the j-schools' director of gratuate studies...

Dear recent grad: Somehow, the J-School has lost touch with you. No, this isn't a dunning letter! But we would like to know what you are up to.
What's your current (or very recent) job? Even if it's not in journalism, we'd like to know. Please write back!

Thanks, Clem Work

Jeff's response...

I'm a no-good street hustler. A dealer. To put it bluntly, I work at Crazy Mike's videostore. It's that little shop around the corner that doles out everyone's drugs of choice: action, drama, comedy. You name it, and we'll search the foreign aisles to find it.

Our clientele are mostly regulars. You can tell them by their sweaty palms and glossy eyes. Hooking them's easy. Watch them wander the store, checking out the merchandise. Advise them to try "Good Will Hunting," a purple-sticky-punch flavor with a nice aftertaste. When they come back, hit them with "Pulp Fiction," the Alaskan-thunderfuck of movies. After that, they'll be waiting in winter weather every Tuesday morning just to catch the next cheap trick coming off Hollywood's supply lines. They're not just the low-lifes anymore. I saw a few of my former professors walking out, five movies in hand. Before, they never smoked movies, just drank books. Yeah right. I knew an addict when I saw one.